Maid, Mother, Crone

I am entering into the "Crone" phase of my life. I don't mind it really. I deal with the grey hair with dye, the lines around my eyes give me some "personality" and the things I have learned in my 44 years on this earth are priceless.

My children are grown up and even though one is still living at home, they are both going to college and have their own lives now.

For the most part...I think I'm handling the aging process pretty well. There is just a few little things that are driving me nuts:

Hot flashes - GEEZ LOUEEEEZZZE - what the fa? Sometimes it's like a ball of fire being thrown at your face, or it could just be a slow gradual warming sensation, but the one that drives me nuts is the instantaneous burst of sweat over your entire body. EEEGADS! One minute you're talking to someone...next minute your panting...sweat dripping from your boobs and forehead. Fuckin' A

Then...I get the chills as the sweat dries.

I put a fan on me or crank up the AC when they come...then I get up to turn off the fan or the AC when I start to freeze.

Now mind you...my partner, M, is just a wee bit older than I am and experiencing similar peri-menopausal conditions. Bedtime is LOADS of fun! Covers on...covers off. Feet in...feet out. AC blasting...AC OFF.

Of course we don't have these occurrences at the same time so we do this odd sort of dance with our bed linens all night long. I have been spare the sopping wet night sweats where you wake up and you are literally are soaked to the skin in perspiration, but unfortunately M has not been as fortunate.

So when you hear that older womyn are HOT...they mean it...literally!

Another thing I don't deal well with is certain foods. Foods I used to love and enjoy when I was younger...I can no longer tolerate. They either upset my stomach, make me blow up like a balloon, constipate me or just the opposite. I used to have a cast iron stomach...not too much would bother me...not anymore. Plus - I gain weight just by looking at food now. That's fun. I drooled as my daughter who is model thin was eating this delicious looking pastry in front of me the other morning. She offered me some, but mindful of my diet...I declined. The evil Mom in me thought - "just wait missy...your metabolism will catch up to you too!"

I was never the one to use the salt much on foods, but now I'm very sodium sensitive. I enjoy going out to eat, but most of the foods at the restaurants have so much sodium on then that I can feel my blood pressure rise and I bloat up!

Being of Irish descent, potatoes or some sort of carbohydrate was always at a meal - not anymore. My partner is from Puerto Rico where yummy rice and beans and Arroz con Pollo comes from.

RICE....BEANS....gastronomic disaster!!!

All in all though, these are just small annoyances. Things do not bother me as much as they did when I was younger, I see life in a different perspective now. I slow down...enjoy little moments. I'm definitely not in any rush to get older anymore, but I don't want to live til' I'm 90 either. Unless I'm healthy and spry.

I laugh much easier these days too. Why the hell not? Laughing is much more fun than worrying.

I'm older, but I'm not grown up yet. We baby boomers are holding onto our youthful ways far longer than our parents did that is for sure. I don't think I'll ever grow up...I have grown up moments, but I try not to stay there too long. It doesn't fit my personality.