I need a list

A list of things to talk about in this months session with Counselor G.

If anyone has ever been to therapy perhaps they can relate - but there are times when I have absolutely NOTHING to say and then there are other times when I'm just getting warmed up and my 45 minutes are up.

Counselor G has suggested that I write things down to talk about - ok. I've done that in the past and it does work, but when you only go once a month and you write things down almost every day - that's a lot of "stuff".

So I try to make a bullet pointed list.

::::drumming fingers::::

This comes from that Virgo side of me - the list maker. It also comes from many, many years as an administrative ass. Write down the important stuff - don't worry about the little stuff.

I had a boss - ex-military guy who wanted all communique to him in bullet pointed lists.

Then in true bureaucratic fashion he would print up the e-mail/list and walk over to your desk and re-hash the list with you. THen go back to his desk and send you a reply in his own long winded un-bullet pointed, reconstituted version of the same story. Only this time it came from Him so it was right.

I'm sure everyone knows at least one person like this in their lives.

As I get older I realize I need more lists.

Actually it's usually just one list - kind of like an extended "to do" list.

I have the "Overall" to do list: paint the laundry room, new refridgerator, call the plumber, yada, yada, yada.

Then I drill it down to the daily list: wake up, take a shower, eat your breakfast, take your vitamins, go to the store....which drills down to what to buy at what store. Grocery store or general store like Target etc.

In there somewhere is always the "honey do" list. Things Margie may have asked me to do for her during the day. Call the vet, go to the post office that sort of thing.

Everything runs along very smoothly in my life with my little lists.

Written down on little scraps of paper, post it notes, on the white board in the kitchen or in a journal. I have lists every where.

Once in a while - I lose my list.

CRAP!

What did I need from the store? Olive oil, ground beef, eggs and what? toothpaste? Foil? toiletpaper?

Why is it that last item you can't remember is always the one thing you needed most?

I've put my list in my coat pocket and then reached in and took out the list from the week before and has a vague sense of deja vu until I'm halfway through the list and think: D'oh!!!

Appointments are the new lists in my life. It's not that I always remembered my appointments before, but now it's that I have too many appointments to remember which one is when!

Doctor(s) - various
Dentist
Counselor
Electrolysis
Vet
Meetings with friends
Work - since it's so sporadic these days

I never thought I would have to keep a calendar - but now I do.

Now I need a list to list all of the things that I need a list for!

(Ok...you knew that was coming, so sue me)

This is all part of the aging process and part of life. I remember my Grandmother having lists every where - then my parents...now me.

I wonder - is it because of failing memory or because I have too much going on or a combination of both.

Selective memory plays a part too.

I will remember a lunch date before I will remember an appointment for the dentist!
(Pleasure vs. pain)

Everything will be fine....

unless of course I lost my lists!

HA!

The mind...

getting older...

Do you worry about your mind?

Is it playing tricks? Is it age? Information overload? Something else?

Should I really care if I AM losing my mind?

While writing this post I was thinking of a movie that Margie and I watched a while back called: Young@Heart

It is a chorus of seniors singing contemporary songs. It's a great movie and I think it may alleviate some fears about getting older. It may make your fears worse - but all in all it's a movie about life.

Spirit

Fun

Getting old

Failing memories

Enjoying the life you have!

Here's a clip from the movie. I hope you enjoy it and if you have a chance to rent it please do. I think it will definitely make you smile!



If you search around YouTube - check out "I want to be Sedated" it's great!

Peace all!

We'll have a gay ol' time

My new job has the makings for a great sitcom!

There are the main characters: Kim and Helen - partners and owners of "The Cab".

Both ladies are in thier 50's. Kim is the business woman - knows how to play the price game with the vendors and it always looking for a new thing to get in customers. She deals with the money and how to keep the business afloat. She as recently been knick named "Mama Cab" buy some of the regulars. Mama Cab is quite animated and loves the kids that come in. She's quick with a baloon for the little ones or a free whip cream shot to the teenagers. Mama Cab organizes the contests: Crazy Hat Day, Silly Sock day, Knock, Knock Joke day etc.

Helen is an artist. Completely the opposite of Kim and thinks from the right side of the brain. Her art is hung on the walls of the Cab only to serve as a bitter reminder that now dough is her canvas and buttercream frosting is medium these days. Helen is a bit more serious than her partner of 9 years. She is a bit nervous about the business and is always going through a mental check list of things that need to be done. Highly organized, perhaps a bit anal and runs around like a chicken with her head cut off but she gets things done!

Then there is me - Shazza, sort of the comic relief at times, but often moody. Has been known to break out in song at the spur of the moment and dance with dough. Decorating hundreds of gingerbread people is enough to drive her absolutely freakin' nuts! I am kept in the kitchen and only occasionally amd allowed to come out and mingle with the customers. Keep her baking! Keep her baking!!!

The customers are the real gems of "The Cab". There are "the students" who come in for their lunch breaks to load themselves up on cookies, mega brownies and double layered cookie pies and then wash them down with pure cane sugar Jones Soda. The Geeks, the freaks and the jocks all co-existing together for the sugar rush and a cheap lunch.

Some of the students we actually know their names but we have given them nicknames that best describe them. Not a lot of thought has been put to these names, but they work some how: Brownie boy - buys at least 1 double dark chocolate Ghiradelli brownie a day, Root Beer boy who is addicted to our root beer flavored milk shakes, pink hair girl (she has pink hair), blue haired girl (she has blue hair), tree nut boy (cannot have anything with tree nuts) etc.

Tea lady - comes in every day for a cup of tea, reads the paper and puts on her make up.

Love birds - the work together and come in every morning for a cup of coffee and a bit of intimate conversation.

Thumbprint addict - is in 2 - 3 times a week to buy up all of our raspberry thumbprint cookies.

Bran Muffin man - he looks like he's in his 80's. Runs 5k's and comes in for the occasional "healthy harvest" bran muffin. Sometimes a cookie as well! ;)

Hot dog guy - two hot dogs with mustard and kraut, and a chocolate chip cookie as desert.

Yadda, yadda, yadda - and so on and so forth!

There is a group of out and proud gay kids who have made "The Cab" their home. Mama Cab organized a "make your own mini cookie pie" day and all of the gay kids came in and played with cookies and frosting and gummi bears and all sorts of sugary sweets. Then they hung around and played their music and a few got a bit "cuddly" with each other.

"The Cab" has become a place where they feel safe and know that they can be themselves with us.

Very cool!

Wednesday nights are Teen nights and the place gets packed with kids from all over and an impromptu karaoke and dance seems to evolve. Mama Cab lets them have their fun but at 8:00 PM it's over and "The Cab" is closed. The teens dutifully return their tables back to where they were, and clean up after themselves and say thank you as they walk out the door.

We laugh a lot at "The Cab". This has been the most fun I've had at a job in ages. I seem to be channeling my Grandmother Harrison who was actually a master baker and have made some scrumptious scones and marvelous mocha munchis as well as the freakin' gingerbread armies!

I will somehow have to find a way to put all of the shenannigans down on paper - who knows maybe I'm on to something here!