Friday, February 20, 2009

I feel good!

The week is ending on an up note. Well as of 8:47 am it's still is anyway. I've been on sort of an employment roller coaster. I don't want to get into too many details right now, just because I'm trying to push it all out of my mind, but I will say that after a nice long conversation with my ex-Big Cheese from the company I used to work with I feel much better.

Big Cheese is only about 3 months older than I am - so it's hard to think of him as a "fatherly" figure, but he is definitely a mentor.

I think I have had 2 people in my life (out side of family and friends and relationship) who have really helped me along in my life.

The first was a guy named Joe L. He was the lighting and stage designer at the small local community theatre I worked at as a kid. He took me under his wing, was very protective of me and took the time to help me understand what color gels go into the lights and what effect he was achieving. We spent hour and hours until the wee hours of the morning untangling and tagging wires for the light board and then checking and re-checking to make sure they were correct.

He was very meticulous in his craft and he was very good at what he did.

My Dad even trusted him to take me to NYC to hang out with his friends. And Joe always respected that trust and made sure I didn't get into any trouble at the cast parties! There was one great Welcome Back Skylab party that I bent those rules a little bit - but again he made sure I got home safely.

I often think of him and how much he taught me and how he made me love the theatre inside and out.

Next is the Big Cheese. I know I've posted about him before on my blog. Where I used to work his office was right next to mine and so he had to walk by me every day. He always would say good morning and good night and often he would stop and just sit in my office and chat about - whatever it is he wanted to chat about. Usually he would notice a new piece of tacky something or other that I added to my office. His favorite was my Lucky Waving Cat:

He could NOT believe that anyone would ever buy something like that! (I hid it in his office when I left!)

Anyway - I've been having some job issues and I had gone in to talk to him about getting my old job back. I know the routine, I know the company, there would not be any learning curve to train me and I admitted to him that I thought I made a big mistake leaving.

He asked my why I don't like my new job - and I gave him my reasons. He asked me why I left my job with his company and I gave him my reasons for that as well.

Then he looked at me and said- "you don't appear to me to be someone who makes rash decisions, but my advice to you would be to stick it out at this new place for a while because I think you can do it. I've always thought you were a "doer" so to speak and I know you can do this. It may not be what you thought or wanted it to be, but you can do it."

We then joked around a bit, he told me he found the cat and it's no longer in hiding! (I felt pretty good about that) He wished me well and told me to keep in touch. Which I definitely will.

Then I thought about it.

And I thought a little more.

Then I realized - he is probably right. I can do this. Whether or not I want to do this remains the question, but I CAN do it.

Why is it that sometimes people all around you can tell you that you can do something and you respond: "yeah, yeah I know" and you don't really believe them or you just kind of push it off, but every once in a while there is someone in your life who says those same few words and it give you that little boost you needed to get it done?

Big Cheese is definitely one of those people who I have admired and respected before, but now I think I have a new appreciation for him.

So I dedicate this little song to the Big Cheese - thanks for boosting me up!

Happy Friday all!



Poetikat said...

I hope it works out for you Shaz. It's nice to have someone who can kind of make things clearer, isn't it?
Where did this video clip come from? Is it promotional for the Dairy Association or something?


Shazza said...

Kat - Thank you, somehow or other it will work out.
The only thing I remember about that commercial was that it was on during Saturday morning cartoons like School House Rock. Time for Timer is his name.

the only daughter said...

I'm at work (with the crappy server) so the video won't come in, but I get the point. Good to have someone to bounce thoughts and ideas off. Good that what comes back helps to clarify.

You'll find the right path and make it work.


neetzy said...

I'm glad you're feeling positive and that M had a great b-day.

Just a quick question. Is it that you are afraid that you cannot do your new job or is it that you have gained an intense dislike of the job. Namely the business, the specific company, the juju of the whole shebang? There is a difference... I suspected the latter.

Shazza said...

OD - Thank you for the kind words. They are greatly appreciated.

Neetz - Good questions! I don't like that this is a "hard" sell kind of business. I can't comment about the company because the owner is an ex-lawyer and I think she would sue for any ol' reason. And I don't like corporate sales AT all. That is soooo not me. I'll sell to a librarian any day, but a procurement thank you. It's just not me.

Presbyfruit said...

Great post! I read it to Kari and she told me a story about her former boss giving her similar advice, much like a dad would. I know you can do this current somewhat sucky job too!

Thanks for the video. I used to walk around singing that song!

Poetikat said...

Neetzy - are you a Siouxsie fan? Just wondering with your "juju" reference.


Vic Hubbard said...

It IS really weird how the same thing can be said by those closest to you but, won't be taken to heart until that one special person says it.