Excuse me waiter?

There is no food on my table!

:::Warning - general rant in process:::

Margie has a new job! After what seems like an eternity of phone interviews and in person interviews and online personality tests, comprehension tests (which she did very well with) she is finally leaving "The Little Troll" behind in her dust and head on to greener $$ and happier pastures!

What happens when you celebrate? You go out to dinner or something.

I chose a restaurant that is close to home, has a wonderful view of the Metedeconk River and supposedly has wonderful food.

And it was all true - basically.

So let us start from the very beginning - it's always a very good place to start.

I called "Antonino's Sunset Grille" to see if they took reservations. They did! (This is on a Saturday night). I asked if they had any openings for 7:00 PM. They did.

That should have been my first red flag. What restaurant along a coastal town in the middle of summer takes last minute reservations for the prime dinner hour?

OK...whatever.

Margie and I promptly arrive at 7:00 with our bottle of wine (BYOB) let the hostess know we had a reservation, she found our name and said it would just be a few minutes.

No biggie.

Another couple arrived after us, they too had a reservation at 7:00 - hostess gave them the same spiel. They decided to wait outside by the docks. We waited inside, which was our first mistake because it was probably 20 degrees warmer inside than it was outside which was about 90 F.

Apologies, apologies...we'll have your table in a minute folks...yadda, yadda, yadda.

No worries - it's Saturday night, during the summer...you expect this here.

About 15 - 20 later we got our table. In the spillover room with no way to view the docks, the water or the sunset.

(red flag #2)

Alan - our charming and somewhat humorous waiter told us he would get some glasses for our wine, the busboy came over and filled our water glasses.

Approximate time: 7:25 PM

Busboy - brings the obligatory bread/olive oil and seasoning dipping things in it and overfills the olive oil just a weeeee bit. No worries - we munch on the bread and enjoy the wine.

10 - 15 minutes later the hostess comes out and asks us how everything is?

Wait - what? everything? We only have bread and water.

I make the snarkey remark: "I feel like I'm in prison and we're only being given bread and water." She chuckles. Poor thing, she was about 12 she had no clue that I was serious.

Sometime later the charming and delightful "Alan" brings our wine glasses and opens up our bottle!

Thank you JEEESZUS!

Approximate time: 8:00 PM

Party of 4 comes in...sits down. Definitely a wiseguy...right down to his little leather loafers and shorts and his slicked back 5 strands of hair. His "real" wife and 2 boys were with him. Meanwhile he must have gotten up about 4 times during dinner. (maybe he has a small bladder...I dunno)

Alan comes sweating in...and announces the specials to both our table and table of 4. Then tells us he'll be back in a few minutes to take our order.

tik tok

:::drumming fingers::::

Oh..here he comes!

He takes our order and also the table of 4's order. (meanwhile there to 2 tables in the spillover room that have been sitting empty for about 30 minutes. Lot's of laughter and food in the "main" room while Margie and I enjoy our wine (on our 2nd glass now) and bread and water.

We were kind of glad we didn't get the window seat because the sunset was blinding the other people in the room who did have the view. (Poor bastards)

The sun was heating up the spillover room and I'm sweating like a horse. I excuse myself to go to the ladies and the AC is crankin' in there. I actually linger a bit just to cool off.

We get our appetizers: clams casino for me, fried calamari for Margie. Both very good.

Meanwhile we try to slow down on the wine because it's going fast. Busboy had refilled my water glass about 20 times to keep me hydrated because it's so freakin' hot in there. (we like busboy)

Salads come - Alan forgot we ordered the dressing on the side. Not a big deal...we nibble because we ate the whole basket of bread, our appetizer and a bit of salad now so we want to leave room for dinner.

Approximate time: 8:30 PM

Meanwhile our 12 year old hostess as come to us about 5 times and asked how is "everything" and I removed all snarkiness and just said: we would like our dinner please!

8:35 - charming and delightful "Alan" serves family of 4 who came in 30 minutes after us their food.

WTF? Obviously Mr. Wiseguy made a "few phone calls" and got preferential treatment.

Charming and delightful "Alan" does not even look at our table when he waits on them.

::::my Irish is getting up:::

Table of 2 enters the spillover room...they have a very pleasant waitress, takes there order, gets their drinks, and their salads all in a fraction of time that we've been sitting there.

Margie and I decide that if and when our dinner comes we will tell them to wrap it up we are going home.

Approximate time: 9:01

2 seconds later...our dinner comes.

Do we tell them to wrap it up? Nooooooooo, we did however tell "Alan" to bring us our check because we need to leave. He tries to be charming again, but it doesn't work.

Ha, ha, ha...heh, heh, heh. fake laughter ensues.

The wine is long gone, it's a sauna in the spill over room, we've been there for over 2 hours and I'm cranky.

Margie and I both had one of the specials: steak and shrimp with Jamiacan jerk sauce.

eeeeeechiiiiiiiwawa

That shit was spicy! But...to their credit, it was grilled to perfection, and it was very tender.

12 year old hostess asks yet again "how is everything". I don't know how to answer her anymore. The poor thing looks so pathetic. She knows we aren't happy, she is afraid we will yell at her, she had nothing to do with this fiasco so I just mumble...food is good, we need to leave" and she timidly takes our bill to process.

2 hours, wine is gone, sweating like a horse AND I have Jamaican spices making it worse and we are DONE.

I made another trip into the ladies to cool off for a bit in the mean time.

We take our little styrofoam containers and leave. "Alan" says..."good night Sharon...good night...oh...what is your name again?" Margie says: "Margarita", "Alan" tries to put on some last minute charm and says" oh not...it is NOT Margarita...I thought you were joking!?"

Fuck off asshole and enjoy that measly little tip we left for the busboy and the hostess because you're an idiot!

All in all - Margie and I had some great conversation, a nice bottle of wine and great story to tell anyone who asks us about "Antonino's Sunset Grille".

If they still want to go after hearing all this...that is their problem!

Good night all!

Warning crazy woman rant

B.P.

British Petroleum.

In the slight chance you've been living under a rock for the past 2 months let me give you the cliff notes:

April 20, 2010 an explosion on the oil rig "Deepwater Horizon" occurs. Of the 126 on board the rig 15 people were injured, 11 died. The rig is owned by Transocean Ltd. and was under contract with BP to drill an exploratory well in an area that the rig was operating.

April 22 a second explosion on board the rig causes it to sink into the Gulf of Mexico. A Riser pipe which goes from the wellhead to the drilling ship breaks as the rig sinks.

April 24 - two oil leaks from the well pipe down about 5000 feet underwater are found. Initial estimate of 1000 barrels a day could be leaking into the water...estimates were later revised to 5,000 barrels a day. Each barrel holds about 42 gallons, so that is an estimated 210K gallons per day.
Consider that we here in the USofA consume over 10 million barrels a day, doesn't seem like a big deal does it?

10 million barrels a day people!!! How many oil rigs would we have to have to satiate our lust for oil anyway? Hmmmmm? Drill here, drill now - yadda yadda yadda. It's a freakin' drop in the bucket and it would NOT lower the price of the barrel because we would STILL be dependent on foreign oil.

But I digress...

April 27 - Sec of Homeland Security, Janet Napolitano and Sec of Interior Ken Salazar sign an order for a joint investigation of just what the hell happened. Napolitano later declared the incident to be a "spill of national significance."

Yadda, yadda, yadda - lots of people telling lots of other people what to do...

May 2, 2010 - BP tries to drill a relief well 1/2 mile from the leaking well which will "attempt" to intercept the existing well. BP estimates it will take about 90 days to complete.
(Meanwhile we are on day 12 of 5000 barrels of oil just pouring into the gulf)

May 4 - the Pentagon mobilizes up to 17,500 National Guard troops to help various states deal with the spill.
(day 14 of 5000 barrels of oil just pouring into the gulf)

May 5 - BP announces it stopped 1 of THREE leak points, but it does not slow the rate of the leak.
(day 15 of 5000 barrels......)

May 8 - The cofferdam or dome cannot be placed over the leak. (The dome at this point is just sitting on the ocean floor)

May 11 - Secretary Salazar announces that he's going to restructure stuff around and establish an "independent safety and environmental enforcement entity". ohhhhhh....ahhhhhh...an entity is born. My vision is a bunch of people sitting around a big conference table with coffee and assorted pastries discussing what to discuss about what's being discussed about this disgusting disaster.

May 14 - President Obama announces he has ordered Sec. Salazar (I can't type that name without thinking in my head "Sal a ZAAAAAAARRRRRR" in a superhero voice) to conduct a "top to bottom" review of the Mineral Management Service. (I'm not saying he's a superhero OK because he isn't. He's just a guy who probably doesn't get much sleep right now)

Wait! Who? MMS (governments love the use of acronyms). YES...MMS, they are the Federal agency that manages our natural gas, oil and other "mineral resources". They also collect, account and disburses an average of $13.7 per year in revenues from Federal offshore drilling and other stuff! How about that?

(things that make you go hmmmmmmm.)

I'm so glad that the Prez was on top of things. 24 days into this and he finally makes a decision.

May 16th - a (RITT) riser insertion tube tool was inserted into the leaking riser and captures slightly more than 2,000 barrels a day. Whew...at least they are slowing things down a bit...still for over 24 days we had 5,000 barrels a day worth of oil spewing into the gulf. Meanwhile Secty's Napolitano and Sal-a-Zaaaaaar sick the dogs after BP CEO Tony Hayward. (Go get 'em Blue....aaaaaoooooooo, aaaaaaooooooooooo, aaaaaaoooooooo)

May 17th the second relief well project begins. (remember it will take about 90 days)

May 18th - 22nd - blah, blah, blah...lot's of b-b-bureaucratic baloney and bullshit starts flying around reacting to what has happened.

Oh...and Mr. Hayward claims the impact of the spill will be "very modest". (I want whatever he's smokin' dude) He says this as some of the clumpy, lumpy, nasty tar balls are discovered around Florida. (must be some goooooooood shit man)

May 22nd - ahem, ahem....let me use my announcer voice: "OBAMA SIGNS AND EXECUTIVE ORDERRRRRRRRRR." Words like bipartisan , recommendations...more baloney and bullshit.

Meanwhile over 2000 barrels of oil is still spewing into the Gulf...I lost count, but we are over 1 month of this black, sticky, messy shit creating havoc to a beautiful body of water that is creeping towards the shorelines of Louisiana, Alabama and Florida cutting off fishing and ruining our shoreline. Pictures of endangered species covered in brown sticky oil are all over the news.

People are getting really pissed off here.

May 23rd...statistical report to make us feel a little better: "1.73 million feet of containment boom and 730,000 feet of absorbent boom have been deployed to contain the spill. Approximately 10.2 million gallons of oil-water mix had been recovered. Approx 785,000 gallons of dispersant deployed on the surface and underwater.

May 24 - 65.6 miles of Louisiana shoreline have been impacted. Fisheries have been declared a disaster.

May 28 - BP attempts to "Plug it up, plug it up!" They kind of say that it's never been attempted before at such depths...and they aren't really sure if it's going to work.

But what the hey? Nothing ventured, nothing gained right?

Fast forward to June 1 - BP shares take a tumble, the "top kill" operation fails and BP CEO Tony Haward announces: "I want my life back"

Awwwwwwwww...who feels sorry for Tony?

Hello? Anyone? Hello?

Ohhhhh...hey George...how's it going? Liking the retired life are you? How is Laura doing?

OK...anyone else?

Hmmmmm...sorry Tony. Most of us just don't give a flying fig!

Now...let me just tell you this little tid bit - We...the USofA gave BP the rights to drill because THEY PROMISED, crossed their hearts and hoped to die, stick a needle in their eye that they were equipped to deal with a spill 10 TIMES LARGER, than the current leak.

Oh yeah? Soooooooo...um...what's the deal dudes? What did you have your fingers crossed behind your back or something when you made that promise? Hey...USofA, did anyone ever CHECK this promise to see if it was true?

Nah...gentleman's agreement. We're all adults here. No one is thinking about themselves...or the money, or the big payoff at the end. nope...not us...huh uh.
:::walking away whistling:::

Oh...BP has lost 30Billion pounds of it's market value....boooohoooo.

June 7: BP tells everyone a second containment system will be in place by mid-June.

Yay....hoooraaaay...yippeeee...yahoooo!!!

So we are up to what day 38 now from when this started and still 2000+ gallons of oil spew into the Gulf of Mexico.

But hey....if you look at it from really far up...it's not really THAT big. Come on...the ocean is HUMONGOUS! This is just a blip. No worries.

Oh...BP share continue to drop. wah, wah.

June 8 - Norway says "No Way" to deep water drilling! Good for you!

June 9th - Ohhhhhhh...I LOVE this one: BP BUYS the top Google and Yahoo! search result for terms like "oil spill" in a bid to recover it's public image.

Let me say that one again: They are buying search terms!

WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT ALL ABOUT?

Hello Dr. Spin? Paging Dr. Spin? Is Carl Rove in the house?

June 10 - The US government "signals" it will take legal action to force BP to stop paying a dividend to shareholders.
British Prime Minister David Cameron basically says - I'm OK with that. I'd be pissed off to if a US company did that on my shores. (my spin OK...I'm allowed to spin too aren't I?)

Chairman of the BP's insurance RSA says that Obama's approach to BP is "prejudicial" and urges him to stop criticism of the company.

Well uh yeah of course it is because BP is "responsible" for all of this. Remember r-e-s-p-o-n-s-a-b-i-l-i-t-y? Stuff they taught us as kids?

This is when it really sucks to be The President: You suck if you don't do enough and you suck if you do too much.

I wouldn't want that job EVER and in my personal opinion...anyone who does want that job is a nutcake.

But that's just my personal opinion.

OK...were up to June 11 - David Cameron (remember him...Prime Minister and all that) tells BP Chairman Carl-Henric Svanberg to tell everyone that the company is still strong.

June 12 - Obama calls Cameron on the phone...they chat...ask how the families are, Obama asks: "Do they celebrate Father's Day in the UK?" Cameron sighs...chuckles...ha ha and then officially they tell us that Obama told Cameron that his criticism is all smoke and mirrors and I have to say this or....well....you know the drill Dave...it's all B.S." (these are my interpretations of some of the things I've read...stuff that goes on in my mind on how two politicians of power talk on the phone. )

June 13 - Obama declares: We need more money!!! Someone has to clean this shit up! (uh yeah because we're broke over hear)

June 14 - Obama compares the impact of the oil spill and it's aftermath to the Sept. 11 attacks. 911 made us change our foreign policy and realize how vulnerable we are and this disaster "is going to shape how we think about the environment for many years to come."

I sure hope so.

(we're getting close to the end...hang in there. Stretch...get a glass of water...go to the bathroom, let the dogs out, have a smoke.

Take 5 and then come on back.....

Ok...here we go. Ready?

June 15th - Obama accuses BP of recklessness and names an "oil tsar". A tsar is born!

BP's credit rating...sucks.

June 16th David Cameron wants protection from the US against excessive compensation. (Anyone hear the lawyers in the background telling him what to say?) (Anyone here our lawyers in the background telling us to "take it all! Crush the infidels!" ) (again...my words...people...MY words)

Today is June 19th - it has been about 60 days since the first explosion happened. Everyone is screaming at each other, citizens are appalled and in shock about what has happened.

Boycotts of BP hit the Internet - but listen to me folks...it doesn't hurt BP...it hurts the poor guy who runs the station. BP could really care less about them...trust me. My ex-husband had an Exxon station when the Valdez spill happened. We were vandalized and harassed. Not by people we know...but by strangers who were angry at Exxon. Exxon really didn't give a rats ass about the dealer. If the dealer went out of business...they'll find another one to run the station.

60 days of thousands of gallons just pouring out of this well.

You know things are bad when they actually hire Kevin Costner to help!!!

Serious!

He and his brother have created a machine...a centrifuge type thing that will separate the oil and water and help clear up this mess.

Kevin Costner. Waterworld boy!

If you build it...they will come!

And they are.

And he is!

So, that's my rant. I took information from various places. The facts are there, the interpretation is pure Shazza. This is what I would be saying to you if you and I were at a cocktail party and this subject came up.

It's all me and how I see things.

How do I see it?

A freakin' nightmare. A colossal disaster. A finger pointing, I don't want to take full responsibility pissing contest.

Just shut up and fix it please.

one last thing...i'm up way past my bedtime so I didn't spell check this or edit it. I'm tired.

night night!

B.I.M.B.O.

Ok...I just got to rant here a bit.

I stopped at WaWa to get gas in my car this morning. (NJ is one of two states in in the US the other being Oregon, which you cannot pump your own gas. It's kind of lame, but on cold days...I don't mind too much!)

So...I was sitting there waiting for my car to be refueled and watching the people coming in and out of the store getting their coffee and assorted goodies for their day when a pink mustang pulls into the lot.

My eyes involuntarily rolled back into my head.

It wasn't even a nice pink color...it was a bit Pepto Bismolish.

The Bismomobile pulls into a handicapped spot.

Funny, I didn't see any handicap license plates on her car or tag hanging from her rear view mirror.

Perhaps the driver has a handicap that isn't at first obvious to the naked eye!?

The car door opens and a long thin leg with spiked heals and painted on jeans appears.

The rest of this skinny young thing steps out of the souped up Bismomobile and you can see the "tramp stamp" clearly on her back since the poor thing could only afford 1/2 a jacket that only came down to the middle of her back and was too small to zip up.

What a vision!

Ms. Pink was sporting a hairstyle that I haven't seen since the 80's. It was long and it was blonde in some some areas around her face and darker blonde in the back. She had long curls around her face but then she had this "thing" piled on her head...but just the front part of her head. It kind of looked like she only had time to curl the front and top part of her head because the back of her hair was completely flat!

From where I was at the pumps, I can see the inside of the convenience store. I watch Ms. Pink go to work.

The check out counter is in front and center of the store. I could see a line to the left...about 4 people waiting to check out. Ms. Pink grabs something and then walks to the right side of the counter and throws her stuff on the counter...completely avoiding the line!

And...she got away with it!!!

Where is Maria when you need her?

This gal is a piece of work!

As she exited the store, I was blessed with a full frontal view of Ms. Pink: That THING piled on her head, 1/2 jacket with a hood probably lined with dog fur, BIG hoop earrings, PINK eye shadow and a navel piercing dangling from a body that was nothing but skin and bones.

Somewhere, someone thinks this person is HOT or Sexy, but I just thought she was kind of cartoonish. She must have walked right off the set of Hysterical Blindness.

Yes...there are girls in NJ that really look like this and yes, they seem to be the stereotype that movies such as GoodFellas or shows like the Soprano's like to showcase. In my 44 years of living in this state though, I have to honestly tell you I have not seen too many of these beautiful specimens walking around. They tend to cluster in certain areas like Vineland, Deptford and South Amboy, NJ.

I drove away from Ms. Pink singing the B.I.M.B.O. song!

Germs

I have gotten an e-mail twice in one week from friends about one of those "studies" that people do about germs in food.

This one has to do with the lemons you get in your water or drink when you are at a restaurant and how they are loaded with "fecal bacteria" and are touched by "dirty fingertips of the restaurant employees".

Here is the video on You Tube if you are interested: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeye8wnBJoU

Another fear we can add to our list!

Listen very carefully to the very last part on this video!!!

Now...I'm not a germ-o-phobe. I know many people are and I know there are some people who get sick very easily, but I side more with George Carlin's view on germs:

Our immune system needs something to practice on! It needs germs to practice on!

Armpits, Asshole, Crotch and Teeth!

Amen brother!

Bare with me...

...it's been a baaaaaaaaad week so far.

It started off promising. I got up early on monday morning, determined to put some time on the treadmill...and I did.

Felt good! Invigorated! Energized...ready to go!

Unfortunately...everything else around me wasn't as energized.

Went to the computer to check my e-mail before taking a shower. No internet. damn.

Looked at the modem. There weren't any blinking lights. There were just two lights lit and they just stared at me. Little red devil eyes.

ugh.

There isn't much I can do about this at the moment, may as well shower and eat breakfast and tackle it once I've had some nourishment.

Came back down stairs to check...those two red dots were still there. Still no internet and since we use our cable company for our telephone service...no phone.

Shit, shit, shit.

I work from on mondays and it's a bit hard to work without the internet and without a phone. I have my cell phone and my blackberry, but I hate talking to clients on those.

We use a major cable company that starts with a "C" and ends with "omcast". Talking with these people is right up there on my list of favorite things to do next to: root canals and going to a shopping mall during the Holidays.

I fucking hate it!

9 times out of 10, you will get someone who is trained on the most basic capabilities on trying to restore your access. They follow a script: If customer complains of "A" recommend this: blah, blah, blah, blah.

Blah, blah always starts off with: unplug your modem and wait 30 seconds. Check the connection between computer and modem. yadda, yadda, yadda.

When that doesn't work...they attempt to re-set it remotely. The person I spoke to, tried to re-set our modem about 6 times. She wanted me to restart my computer to see if that works.

Ok...wait....what?

Can someone please tell me how re-starting my computer is going to make my wireless modem work? they aren't connected. My computer doesn't give any power to the modem. How? What the fa?

arg.

Whatever.

After about 30 minutes on the phone with my lovely cable representative, she determined that she needed to send a technician out to see if there was a problem because she couldn't fix it from there. Someone would be there between 1-3.

Fuck!

I am so busy at work...I can't afford the down time, so I called M and asked her if she could take the afternoon off to wait for the cable guy. yes...she could! (Love you!) So I quickly got dressed and drove to Philly for the day.

Monday turned out to be a fairly productive day once I got in the office and settled in, so it wasn't too bad all in all.

The weather on Tuesday threatened: snow/ice/rain. After watching The Weather Channel, checking with 3 or 4 different forecasts and coming to the conclusion that the nasty stuff wasn't going to start until later in the afternoon - I headed into the office. I could have stayed home, but my thought process on this one was: "if I work in Philly Mon, Tues and Wed...then I can work from home on Thursday and Friday!"

Seemed like a good idea at the time.

We have some visitors from our UK office this week and I was invited into a meeting on Tuesday morning to discuss some issues we've been having. Ok...not in the plans for the day, but I really wanted to hear what was said, so I accepted. It was definitely a good choice on my part, but it did put me behind a bit in my work. I got a free lunch out of it...so I'm not complaining!

Checking the forecasts occasionally...no one really predicted it to be too bad in the afternoon. They all said it will be a bit messy for the drive home and take your time, but no winter storm warnings. Just an advisory.

Advisory = no big deal.

Well...around 3:00 pm...I could here the "ting, ting, ting" of ice as it pelted my window. Ugh.

Rain...ok.

Snow - messy...but still OK.

Ice - scary shit to drive in people.

I checked the weather again. "Winter Storm Warning"

FUCK, FUCK, FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

I read something about "significant icing before changing all to rain then heavy rain throughout the night with gusty winds".

Looking out the window...I couldn't see any thing really sticking to the ground, but it's kind of hard to see ice on the ground when you are 8 stories up!

What I should have done right at that moment was pack up my shtuff and go home.

That is what I SHOULD have done.

What I did was finish the work I was doing and didn't leave the office until 5:15 PM.

Not one of my smarter decisions.

The abridged version - it took me 4 white knuckled hours to get home.

Sidenote: People who drive big gas guzzling small dick, big truck SUV's, you are not impervious to ice on the roads. 4WD does not mean you can drive like a fucking maniac and jeapordize everyone else around you! Almost every spin out I saw on the road last night involved an SUV. Alllllllso - if you have snow on the roof of your car, truck or SUV...clean it the fuck off! When that shit breaks up and goes flying in the air...it hits the cars behind you temporarily blinding them because a big chunk of snow has just covered their entire windshield. Or...in the case of ICE...it hits the car behind you with a loud BANG and scares the shit out of the unsuspecting driver.

I got home...tired...tense...a bit cranky. M was a sweetie and had cooked some rice and beans for me. (Love you). I opted for some leftover quesadillas instead, watched the last 30 minutes of the biggest loser and went to bed.

M told me to: "stay home tomorrow, work from home."

"Great idea...I will."

Did I do that?

No.

Why?

I don't know?! Brain fart, hormonal imbalance, temporary insanity, I really don't know.

My eyes sprung open at 5:30 am as they usually do and I decided to come into the office. (I still want to work from home on Thursday and Friday. It's almost like extending my weekend in a way)

It only took me 2 hours to get to work today. It's raining and foggy and people are still nervous from last night. I know I was.

I'm cranky, I'm tired...I'm wired up on Provigil and caffiend to keep me awake and concious for a few hours.

Whatever works right?

My one saving grace for today is that I have an appointment at 7:30 to get my hair cut and colored. It will be nice to have a little pampering...someone rubbing my head. I'll probably fall asleep in the chair...but I don't care.

(For some reason my spell check is not working on the blog anymore, so if there are errors...tough shit...deal)

thankyouverymuchandhavealovelyday!

Bumper Stickers

Ok...there are a few bumper stickers that just kind of irritate me, but the most popular one at the moment is:

Keep Christ in Christmas!

I want to know who took him out? Every time I see Christmas...I see Christ.

Another one I don't like:

God Bless the USA

How about this instead: Bless the World!

Mudslinging

Ok...have you all read the latest political news where one of Hilary's top advisers said that we should pay more attention to Obama's sordid past, especially his drug use as a teenager?

:::sigh:::

Now, after letting the "cat out of the bag" so to speak, that same advisor "deeply regrets" making those comments.

:::sigh:::

I hate elections! I really do! Especially Presidential elections.

This bullshit and mudslinging just irritates the heck out of me and the only thing this story does is make me like Obama more because he could have been one of the kids I hung around when I was a teenager. He told a group of folks that he drank, experimented with drugs and didn't really apply himself during that time in his life. Hello!!!! That was pretty much the entire student population in my H.S. and guess what...the majority of us stopped that shit when we were in our early twenties...ok...some of us later than others and we re-grouped and are now find upstanding citizens.

Well, we are all human and we all have freaky skeletons in our closet. Big freakin' deal!

Hilary isn't so squeaky clean I am sure- she's a LAWYER!!!!

Oy - I can't wait until this crap is over with.

Gratuities for Exceptional Service

I need to vent something here for a minute - so please bear with me.

I buy coffee only on the weekends, and I go to a Dunkin' Donuts near where I live and pull up to the drive through, order my large coffee and then pull up to the next window to pick it up.

As you pull up to the window, you are directly in front of a BIG cup that says: Gratuities for Exceptional Service. This thing irritates the living heck out of me. More than once I have pulled up and the counter person is arranging the dollars bills so that everyone can see them. More than once my change has not even been offered to me, they seem to ASS-U-ME that whatever change I was going to get, was going into that tip cup.

I don't think so sparky.

Gimme, gimme, gimme back my change.

I like to think of myself as a pretty good tipper. Having been a hairdresser in a former life(yeah...I really was), I know what it is like to work for tips. I've had friends who have worked in restaurants who get paid less than minimum wage because they work for tips. When I go out to dinner and someone is waiting on me hand and foot...preparing my meal, bringing it to me, cleaning up after me...I am VERY appreciative of that service and I will tip accordingly.

I just had some trees in my back yard trimmed and pruned. The crew climbed trees, worked with chainsaws, cleaned up my entire yard and were really, really NICE people! I gave each of the guys that worked on that job a tip! They deserved it.

But...this tip cup...strategically placed right at eye level so you feel "guilted" into giving a tip really insults me.

I mean...what service are they really providing: they are pouring my coffee into a Styrofoam cup and handing it to me. They don't give me a stirrer unless I ask for it, they don't even give me napkins unless I ask for them. I don't think that is very good service...never mind "exceptional service".

Occasionally, I buy a donut or a muffin or a cookie. So...gosh...that's an extra 2 or 3 steps I've added to the counter person's JOB!!!

A large coffee where I live comes to $1.97 (incl. tax).

I give them $2.00

They can have the .03!

Don't spend it all in once place buddy.

Commuting

Merge -
transitive and intransitive verb
Definition:

1. combine: to combine or unite with something to form a single entity, or make two or more things do this.
2. blend: to blend, or make two or more things blend, gradually

Yield -

1. transitive verb produce something: to produce something naturally or as a result of cultivation
2. transitive verb give something as result
4. intransitive verb not be firm or solid
5. intransitive verb stop resisting: to stop opposing or resisting and agree to some body's demands or requests
6. intransitive verb surrender: to admit defeat and surrender
9. let another pass: to slow down or stop in order to let another vehicle pass yield to traffic on the right


I have been driving a car for...well.....a pretty long time. Perhaps I need a refresher on my driving abilities because I always applied the two definitions as provided above when I am driving. (well...almost always)

If you have ever driven in NJ, you will understand that driving here is the ultimate fight for the survival of the fittest!!!

It's a competition to see who can get "there" faster. It doesn't matter where "there" is, but everyone is trying to get "there" and they are always in a hurry.

We have a few obstacles that we need to overcome in NJ that I think roadway engineers must sit back and chuckle about from time to time.


These obstacles are: Entrance and exit ramps

I never quite understood why they were designed so that the ramp with slow moving cars merging into the highway were place right before ramps with fast moving cars trying to get off the highway.

Remember those definitions from above:

Merge - combine, blend, unite
Yield - give something up, be not firm, admit defeat, LET OTHER PEOPLE INTO THE FREAKIN' ROADWAY DAMMIT!!!!

These are not the definitions that the NJ driver understand. To "merge" is to wedge your obscenely large SUV the size of a tank into traffic going about 70 - 75 mph without slowing down. (remember...we're in a hurry to get "there")

Turn signals are definitely optional in a merge. Why give the competition and edge?

No freakin' way!

Keep them alert...don't ever let them think that they know what your next move will be.

Yield - ha...yield is not even in the average NJ vocabulary.

We don't even know what it means.

When some poor slob from another state drives on our highways and actually slows down and tries to yield to the right of way, he/she is greeted with blaring horns, various forms of sign language and "the stare".

I think "the stare" is really the most effective use of communication to be honest. When someone gives me "the stare", I can't function for the rest of the day. "The Stare" basically says: "what the hell are you doing you freakin' idiot, nobody "slows down" at a yield sign...just the opposite...we speed up and see who the hell we can cut off we're trying to MERGE here!!!"

Rules, rules, rules

Please don't get me wrong, I think that rules/laws for the most part are a good thing, but I do get the feeling that we, as a nation, are going overboard just a bit too much.

One of my previous posts, I ranted about the ban for "Props" in school pictures...now, they are banning Hugs.


Yes...Hugs.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21097673/

Somewhere they also banned the game of tag because if kids got hurt during recess, the school fears the parents may sue. (It's all about the money in the end isn't it?)

What is next?

A ban on eating twinkies because your kid isn't allowed to eat them and seeing OTHER kids with them will cause jealousy and confusion and the potential for twinkie binging?

I admit, I am not a big fan of overzealous public displays of affection. I mean really, who wants to see two people playing tonsil hockey in front of you! GET A ROOM! but to all out BAN hugs seems a little overboard.

Actually, the ban is on all physical contact. No hugging, holding hands etc. I guess that means shaking hands is out of the question. So would be helping someone up if they fell down.

If I was still in high school I would be the kid going down the hall touching everyone I came near, just to test out the new rule.

touch

touch

touch

Tag! YOUR IT!

heh, heh, heh

Password hell

Today I am in freakin' password hell.

My pin # for my ATM card doesn't work for some mysterious reason.

I'm having some computer troubles, so I attempted to log into the web site were I purchase my new laptop and finally needed them to set me a NEW password because none of the standard 3 or 4 that I usually use didn't seem to work.

I have 4 or 5 different passwords at work:

One to get on to my computer that changes every 60 days or so, then I have several different "online" programs that I need to access when I am working from home. Every time I forget one of these...they reset it, but of course it can't be anything close to a former password, so I have to create an entirely NEW one and since it's not one of the 3 or 4 passwords that I like to use...I always forget it.

I could write these down and stash them somewhere, but I think that is counter intuitive to the whole "secure password" idea.

The passwords you have to re-set after 60 days really get on my nerves. You've gone through your repertoire of commonly used passwords, then you start using your pets names, or looking at things on your desk, of course you always have to stick a number in there and now some passwords want you to mix up the upper case and lower case letters.

Brilliant...I just had a password reset and I got an e-mail telling me that they don't have me in their database. Now I have to figure out which e-mail I used to create this freakin' account.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!

Political comments

Bush Urges U.N. to Spread Freedom

By BEN FELLER, Associated Press Writer


UNITED NATIONS - President Bush announced new sanctions Tuesday against the military dictatorship in Myanmar, accusing it of imposing "a 19-year reign of fear" that denies basic freedoms of speech, assembly and worship.

(as opposed to his reign of fear that the republicans use every time they think they are going to lose an election?)

"Every civilized nation also has a responsibility to stand up for the people suffering under dictatorship," the president said. "In Belarus, North Korea, Syria and Iran, brutal regimes deny their people the fundamental rights enshrined in the Universal Declaration" of the United Nations.

(Except for the US of course, because we're better than every body else and that stuff doesn't apply to us right?)

While the war in Iraq continues, Bush made scant mention of it.

(Gosh...I wonder why, but it was a MISTAKE to begin with, and there is NO WAY TO WIN and now we have to finish what we've started because we've disrupted the lives of millions of Iraqi people?)

After his speech, however, he reassured Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki that U.S. support is not wavering. "We're with ya, prime minister," Bush told him.

(He's so elequent isn't he?)

Brain Fog

I called my boss around 3:00 today and told her I was taking the rest of the day off. I am having a horrible case of brain fog today. More so than my usual scatterbrainedness - and it has me a bit concerned.

Called the Doc about my meds, she told me to cut the dosage in half and see how I do and to keep my follow up appointment with her on Monday. By then they should have my blood work back and we'll see how the Lyme disease is doing.

Today - I fluctuated between freezing with chills and sweating bullets, feeling nauseous, fuzzy headed, sleepy, agitated, irritated, buzzing head, achy and downright...blech.

This shit has got to stop.

I literally feel like I'm losing my mind. Maybe I am.

Maybe it's not me really typing this, but someone else?

My neurotic dog isn't making it any easier on me today. He's in a barking mood and when he's in that mood, the only thing that will stop him from barking is for me to make him lay next to me and hold his little mouth closed until he calms himself down.

We both need prozac.

The other dog - he's happy in his own stupidity. He is just simple...and carefree. Just rub his belly, feed him and let him chase the squirrles and he's content.

I wish I was him today.

I'm ranting and probably ragging too

You know...this kind of shit drives me absolutely crazy. Some girl in New Hampshire had her year book picture banned because she was holding a rose and the High School has a policy about holding props in year book photos.

The ban was put in place when previously another student wanted his photo in the yearbook holding a gun and they refused to print it.

The mother of the girl wasn't aware of the policy, the school didn't print the policy until this year, but they did send out an e-mail alerting parents of the due date of when to submit photos and stated that no props were allowed.

Now...if the school bends to the public pressure and allows the photo of the girl holding the rose, next year they are going to have to put before the school board a vote of what is an appropriate prop and what isn't. A referendum will take place, taxes will rise, protests will be held by the kids who want their pet rat, or a pick ax, a teddy bear, or whips and chains in their photos.

On the other hand, if they stand firm by their decision, they will be paraded by the media as being a little too strict...I mean come on...it's just a rose...it's not a gun for pete's sake and next year there will be a vote on the whole issue, are props allowed? What is an appropriate prop and what isn't? A referendum will take place, taxes will rise, protests will be held by the kids who want their pet rat, or a pick ax, a teddy bear or whips and chains in their photos.

Sometimes I think we have too many freakin' rules.

I say...let the guns and roses stay! Bring on the teddy bears and pick axes, throw in some rats and dogs, kitty cats and pet fishes, whips and chains and cars and boats and hats, scarves, knives, butterflies.

Who really gives a shit!?!? I mean...really?!?

It's a no win situation anyway because you just can't make everyone happy all of the time. It's impossible.

I could get into a whole dialog about personal responsibility, but I think I've said enough for one day.